I used to say 'Yes" to everything. I was a people pleaser- whenever someone said they needed help with something I would hop to it. I was in a million activities as a student and still did a million things as an adult. I talk more about this in my live discussion here.
Self-Respect means having pride or confidence in oneself-behaving with honor and dignity. It also means that you believe you are good and worthy of being treated well. Around two years ago I promised myself that I deserve to be treated better and I started saying 'no' to things that were not part of my ultimate purpose in life.
I used to think that saying no was a weakness, but then I realized as I started saying it more and more, that it is not a weakness and in fact a strength to speak up and not to do things that don't serve your own happiness.
My tips for creating boundaries are:
1. Get some clarity around the vision for yourself
What is your purpose in life? Where do you see yourself 6 months, a year, 5 years from now? What are your dreams and how are you going to get there- what's the plan? If you are clear on this- it is very easy to say no to things that don't align with your true purpose.
2. Be self-aware
Know yourself, your past, and your behaviors. The more that you become aware of yourself, the more you can find ways to create the perfect boundaries for ultimate success.
3. Be direct and assertive
Speak up, say what you really mean, ask for what you want. No one knows how you are feeling and will not know unless you say something or go after what you want.
4. Start small
Start with 3 or 4 boundaries to begin with and then add more as you get comfortable. You are more likely to be successful enforcing a few to begin with and add more as you go!
5. Reach out for support
If you do not know where to start, reach out to a coach, friend, family, online community, professional etc.
Catch the live replay here and comment- I love to hear your feedback!